Date: Thu, 12 Feb 1998 07:41:30 -0500 (EST)
A Valentine Random Thought: Whom Do You Love?

Well, Valentine's Day is upon us. I've doing my best to ignore all the Cupids and gaudy red and heart-shaped, laced decorations are that draping over every place imaginable. I'm surprised no one had created a red, heart-shape bagel. Or, have they? Anyway, a quote I had received from my good friend John-Mark Stensvaag at Iowa has gotten me thinking about Valentine's Day this misty morning. "Tell me who you love," it went as the finale to a Valentine story, "and I'll tell you who you are."

Ain't that the truth. The depth and breadth of love that is outside-shown, is inside-felt. That's why I'm not wild about doing Valentine's Day. For me, everyday of the past 31 years has been a Valentine's Day. Sounds unromantic? It isn't. Just sincere. There isn't a morning that I don't embrace my angelic Susan and tell her I love her and an evening doesn't end that I don't first kiss her goodnight and tell her I love her. A day doesn't pass that I don't caress her with my eyes and wonder at my luck. No, I don't feel obligated to do Valentine's Day. I prefer the daily, spontaneous, and sincere "just because" moments of expression of what we call "just a little bit"--a wisp of air in the ear, a loving soft touch, a whispered word, an enticing tease, a quick romantic telephone call, a quiet gift or card--to an annual, commercialized demonstration-on-demand with flowers or balloons or chocolate.

And, I'm not so sure it is or should be much different in the classroon. So, immobile on this cold, damp stoop, longing for the freedom of walking the streets, and looking at the hazy moon glowing like an irredescent cotton ball, tell us the students whom you notice, welcome into class, worry about, care about, befriend, believe in, value, reach out for, respect, celebrate, struggle with, fight for, and above all, love day after day after day, and you'll tell us what's in your heart and who you are.

Gotta remember to order some flowers this morning. I'm not stupid.